Mario Lopez thinks he should be dating Eva Longoria right now
Mario Lopez, who by some misguided soul at People Magazine just got named their bachelor of the year, says that he would be with Eva Longoria now if they’d ever been single at the same time.
Lopez says, “We never dated. Unfortunately. We met a long time ago, and she was always with somebody or I was with somebody. But we hit it off and I have the utmost respect for her.
“Tony Parker is a lucky guy. I was in (sic) her wedding. I walked her mum down the aisle.”
Now Mario, it might have been that even if you had dated Eva, she still would have met and fallen madly in love with Tony Parker, who happens to be a lot more loaded that you are.
Of course, what also might have happened is you might have split up because you’ve been f***ing a Hooters waitress. Or a singer. Or a wannabe singer that works at Hooters. Which is how his relationship with Dancing with the Stars partner Karina Smirnoff ended.
Or, you might have split up with her two weeks into your marriage, after cheating on her during the week leading up to your wedding. Which is how his marriage to Ali Laundry ended.
This, according to People Magazine, is the best that the male population has to offer. Mario tells the magazine that he is looking for a woman who is ‘modest’, not ‘uppity or affluent’. I think this means he’s looking for a woman who doesn’t stick up for herself and doesn’t publicly call him out on his philandering.
Mario Lopez is shown promoting his fitness book, Mario Lopez’s Knockout Fitness
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